Absolutely Fobulous

The most romantic holiday of the year is traditionally Valentine’s day. But in Singapore, there’s another holiday that will get couples hot and heavy — and that’s August 9, National Day. It’s the day Singapore officially declared independence from Malaysia in 1965. It was naturally a very groundbreaking moment in the island’s history, and who knew it would inspire Singaporean couples to procreate in years to come? Mentos Singapore created this awesome rap music video “to celebrate not just National Day, but National Night too — and help give our population spurt it so desperately needs.” Oh yeah, and if you’re in a friends with benefits relationship or you’re unemployed, don’t bother watching the video. The blurb in the YouTube video says, “Only financially secure adults in stable, committed, long-term relationships should participate.”

Nice try guys, but the over-the-top lyrics makes it hard to take the message seriously. Some classic lines:

• “I’ll take your breath away like a sonic boom”
• “It’s National Night, so let’s make fireworks ignite.”
• “Like a government scholar, I want to cram real hard.”
• “I want to tap you all night like an EZ link card.” (EZ link cards are basically smart cards that are used to pay for public transportation. It’s akin to the Clipper Card in San Francisco.)
• “I’m a patriotic husband, you’re my patriotic wife, let me book into your camp and manufacture life.”
• “Let’s put a bao in your oven.”

(Thanks, Sara!)

Nevermind the fact that Singapore has never actually won an Olympic gold.  The tiny island’s $804,010 prize (S$1 million) for an Olympic gold medal will definitely keep Singaporeans trying!

This week, Singaporean Feng Tianwei won bronze for table tennis, awarding her a cool $201,000.  Not a bad National Day present for Feng (today is Singapore’s birthday!).  Silver medalists would get about $402,000.  The money comes from the Singapore government’s Multi-Million Dollar Awards Programme, which doles out big bucks for anyone who wins a medal for the country.

Still, while the US by far doesn’t have the biggest payout for Olympic medals, American athletes are more likely to make mega moola from sponsorships.  Michael Phelps, for instance, has an endorsement with Nike that’s apparently worth $50 million.

Maybe it’s for that reason that the top four highest payouts for an Olympic gold medal are all Asian.  Check out the list below — I guess these South East Asian countries really want some gold!

Top 4 countries with highest payouts for an Olympic gold medal

1. Singapore — $804,010

2. Philippines –  $340,900

3. Malaysia – $307,000

4. Thailand – $300,000

(Thanks, Hubie!)

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Single and ready to mingle?  Let the government help you find a girlfriend or boyfriend.  Singapore’s official dating service, ambiguously named the “Social Development Network” or “SDN,”  has been around since 1984 to help single adults get it on.   The SDN offers personals, singles networking events, chatrooms, and discussion forums.  But be warned, it feels kind of like having patronizing parents manage your dating life.  For example, their “Ready to Date” cartoons sound like what you’d tell a geeky, awkward teenager.

But with the country’s plummeting birthrate, Singapore’s pretty shameless when it comes to promoting marriage and babies.  I’ve seen huge billboards promoting picture-perfect scenes of happy families, and the newspaper regularly publishes a “Family” section dedicated to cute baby pictures.

So if you’re single, Singaporean (or a permanent resident), and sick of paying match.com’s monthly fees, then check out SDN!

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And in the latest news from the sunny island of Singapore, a domestic helper recently got in trouble for adding her menstrual fluids to her boss’s coffee. The 24-year-old Indonesian maid, who goes by the name Jumiah, had been working for her 38-year-old male boss for a year in the Choa Chu Kang neighborhood when the event occurred. She apparently tried to ask for a transfer after working for her employer for about one and a half months, but her request was denied. Jumiah apparently thought that adding period blood to his coffee would cause him to treat her better (not sure how that would work). Meanwhile, her boss will probably never be able to look at a cup of coffee in the same light.

The first question that came to mind was how the heck could he tell what was in the coffee? One disgusting hypothesis: the texture of the coffee was off and when he spat it out, he figured out what it was. Or perhaps, she simply told him.

There’s Black Label, Blue Label…and then there’s Diamond Jubilee.  In Singapore, a limited edition whisky made by Johnnie Walker has hit the shelves to commemorate Queen Elizabeth’s 60th year on the throne in England. Only 60 bottles were made, and something tells me that although each bottle costs $198,500, these bottles will get snapped up.

Singapore is the ninth most expensive city in the world, and has the world’s highest concentration of millionaires.  Last year, a Chinese businessman dished out $198,500 for a bottle of rare 62-year-old Dalmore single malt at  Singapore’s Changi Airport Duty Free store.

Apparently, the special blend of whisky has a “velvet texture, the refreshing bitter perfume of spices, pools of soft fruits as it flows down the throat,” according to the Whisky Advocate blog.

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We’ve already mentioned that luxury brands say Asia is their best market, so I’m not really surprised by a study done by the Singapore Management University, which concluded that Singaporean women are materialistic. Um hello, we could’ve told you that!

The study, published mid last year, found that the Singapore women polled ranked a guy’s social status is their top priority, followed by kindness, then a lively personality. As for the American participants, the women valued kindness the most, then looks, and then a guy’s social standing.

Personally, I really feel that the Singapore culture is definitely a lot more materialistic than where I live right now — San Francisco. I don’t know what it is, but I know Suzie said she felt the same way, too. I feel like in Singapore, it’s all about whether you’re driving the new beemer, whereas in SF, that hybrid car is way cooler because you’re saving the environment. I just don’t think people here feel the need to show off their wealth or care a lot about reaching the upper echelons of society. Suzie and I have talked a lot about this and we thought perhaps the SF culture is due to the very pervasive influence of the idea that in America, you can achieve anything you want with hard work and meritocracy. And that seems to be more admirable than simply being born wealthy.

But hey who knows, the results are probably skewed because of the city where the women were polled. The study pulled data from women in Illinois, and the results might’ve been different if they polled women in LA. And I do know S’porean women who aren’t materialistic.

OK, enough with being serious. Here are some funny comments from Singaporean readers regarding the study:

“This is total truth
We say Singapore girls look for 4 Cs or 5 Cs
C – Cash
C – Credit Card
C – Condo
C – Car
C – Company”

“Dumb. think so much for what, don’t get married la, save tons of worries.”

“Hey this is like totally shocking news. I really didn’t know! Who would’ve thought that? And recently I found out water is wet.”

“S’pore girls materialistic?
Fully agree;
Not only materialistic, but also choosy,
hoping to net a Big Fish.
In the end, most of them catch only
the ikan billis (dried anchovies), and decide to give up.
Not surprising many are left behind.”

Living in Singapore, I’ve totally seen ladies walking down the street proudly toting their Gucci bag.  Not the purse, the paper carrier.  Seems odd, but I guess it’s a status statement that these ladies can afford to shop at designer stores.  In China, fake designer paper bags have become the next trend in counterfeit fashion.  Going for only 79 cents or up to $6.30, cheapskate fashionistas can sport their favorite designer brands in the form of a paper baggie.

I know this trend sounds ridiculous, but it doesn’t surprise me at all.  I’ve said before that I’m convinced Asia is way more brand-conscious than the US, and this just proves my point that when it comes to wearing designer clothes, it’s often not about style, but the name.

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By now you’ve probably seen the videos of North Koreans sobbing hysterically over the passing of their dictator, Kim Jong-Il. Turns out, Singapore’s got problems, too. I seriously don’t go one day without seeing a breaking news update about Singapore’s Mass Rapid Transit system (the public train everyone takes to get around the sunny island). The MRT faced a recent series of breakdowns that had commuters out of sorts. But who knew both Kim Jong-Il mourners and distraught Singaporeans could relate to each other in their time of sorrow. Watch the video below to see what I mean:

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You know that slimy trail that snails leave as they slide across the ground?  Well, put that stuff on your face and apparently your acne, wrinkles, and scars will improve dramatically.  In Asia, snail creams have become the hottest phenomenon in beauty products. A Korean company, It’s Skin, recently launched a hugely successful product called “Prestige Cream d’escargo.” Able C&C, which owns the Korean beauty brand Missha, came out with their own snail cream last June.  In fact, since I moved back to Singapore last month, I’ve been bombarded daily by Facebook ads for “Snail Street: No. 1 Snail Cream in Japan.”

Obviously, I couldn’t help but click on this bizarre ad.  Here’s what I’ve learned about our slithering friends: You wouldn’t have realized it, but snail slime has incredible regenerative qualities — it’s what allows snails to regenerate their own shells when they get injured in the wild.  Snail creams started in 1980 when a Chilean family had a snail farm, and the farmers noticed how soft their hands were, and how quickly cuts healed without any scars.  The eldest son was a doctor, and did research on snail secretions.  Turns out, their snails produced a slime that could heal human skin.  Snail creams started selling in Europe years ago, but only recently has it become really popular in Asia.

Honestly, I’m torn.  I’m utterly curious, but even talking about snails makes me cringe.  I shudder at the thought of their slimy antlers feeling their way through the ground.  Ick.

What do you think — would you try this?  A jar of the cream costs about $43 here, if you’re brave enough to buy it!

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So I’m back on the sunny island of Singapore (yay!) and discovered a new show on TV…the Asian Glee!  Well, kind of.  At first, Kitchen Musical seems to be Asia’s spin on the American hit series Glee, but the concept is actually pretty fresh.  The musical TV series’ predominantly Asian cast star as chefs, waitresses, and even a sexy sommelier at a high-end restaurant.  Each episode has a full menu — appetizer, two mains, dessert, and wine pairings — and at the end, they give recipes for the featured dishes.

I don’t know about you, but I’m convinced fobs tend to be die-hard foodies, so the show’s dedication to cooking and eating is smart.   Right now, Kitchen Musical airs only in Asia and Europe.  But don’t worry, Ben Silverman, who adapted BBC’s The Office and the Colombian show Ugly Betty for US viewers, is working on bringing Kitchen Musical to the American audience.