What Chinese people think of the global wiener size stats

by Emily Co on March 30, 2011

A recently released map confirmed a lot of bias on which country hosts the biggest wieners — East Asian countries were the smallest, coming in at 4.3 inches, while those in Africa, Central and South America boasted the largest wangers.

The ultimate champion (cue “We Are the Champions” song) is the Congolese, who have averaged a hefty 7.1 inches. And the biggest loser,or should I say smallest, is…South Korea, clocking in at 3.8 inches. To our Korean readers: feel free to dispute by commenting below.

The data is taken from a hodgepodge of sources, and the research stems from old data. In other words, it isn’t exactly accurate. I just thought I’d share the funny Chinese netizens reactions.

“To tell the truth, my JJ during cold or nervous situations is not 2 inches,  and even shrinks into my body…only when erect is it 4.7 inches, I am so sad. Looks like this is how it will be my entire life. Life is suffering, I especially believe this saying.”

“Laowai [foreigner] , having nothing better to do, even this has to be compared? What use is a big J8~? When someone else comes to attack you, are you going to say, “Wait, my J8 is big”?”

“We had a contest when we were in studying in university! Seven of us in our dorm, the shortest was 4.3 inches, the longest was 6.7 inches, the thickest diameter was 2 inches, the thinnest was 0.7 inches, the strongest could hang 5 wet towels, while the weakest dropped hanging just 1 towel…”

FYI, JJ or J8 is Chinese cyber speak for the male member.

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{ 4 comments… read them below or add one }

ill take it March 31, 2011 at 4:42 am

a few millenia of slavery versus a baby dick? i’ll take it

bigWOWO March 31, 2011 at 7:32 am

Inches? Since when did the Chinese abandon the metric system and start using American measurements?

Emily Co March 31, 2011 at 8:32 am

@bigWOWO Haha, they don’t. I just converted cm to inches!

bigWOWO March 31, 2011 at 2:01 pm

Ahh, okay. I was going to accuse some commenters of trolling!

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