So a few weeks after the infamous WSJ article titled, “Why Chinese Mothers Are Superior” came out, I had the pleasure of attending 
a book discussion in Seattle to hear Ms. Chua, herself, speak out against the controversy she’s stirred up with the recent release of her book, Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother.
While I’m not Amy Chua’s daughter and can’t personally attest to how she is outside of the public eye, she was anything but “tiger-like” at the book discussion. This petite, youthful-looking Yale law professor was poised, personable, and hilarious! Being able to crack jokes and laugh at a situation she deemed as “unpredicted and surreal,” while death threats were being sent to her is admirable in my opinion.
According to Chua, her book is a memoir about her and her family, not a comparative parenting book. “I’m not a parenting expert,” said Chua, “there are many ways of being a good parent.” A lot of the misunderstanding was due to the fact that the WSJ excerpt didn’t convey it was a memoir, and the title given to it was out of her control. The angriest voices are those people who misunderstand the context of her book, and to Chua, the harsh comments are “heartbreaking.”
She sure has people riled — her post has received more comments than any other article published on the WSJ website. She’s even been offered a number of reality show deals, to which her response for all was simply, “no.”
When I read the article, my first thought was, “Wow, she doesn’t let her daughters go to sleepovers? What a crazy lady.” But I thought again, “Wait a minute, I didn’t get to go to sleepovers until I was 15 too. Is my mom crazy? Is my mom a bad mom?” Definitely not.
As a daughter of Asian immigrant parents who escaped during the Vietnam War, I couldn’t agree more with Chua when she said that the reason why a lot of Asian parents have strict parenting styles is because “immigrants who come to this country have a certain type of mentality.” Their main priority coming here is to survive. Asian parents long for their kids to have security, thus they push us to excel in stable professions, such as being a doctor, lawyer, or engineer.
As for why Chua didn’t let her daughters go to sleepovers, she said her dad used to say, “Why go to a stranger’s house to sleep when you have a perfectly nice bed and home?” Touché.
So while Chua is probably busy doing damage control right now, it was thought-provoking, empowering, and rather refreshing to hear what she had to say amidst all the negativity and criticism. “Different cultures should be learning from each other,” said Chua. “You either you get my book or you don’t,” but most importantly, “it’s a book about my love for my kids.”
(Thanks, Joyce, for the photo!)
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I need to get this book. I might use it in my research paper for my class this year haha. Nice article Amy!
I’m not asian, nor american. I am a brazilian mother and my father is german, who was rigid sometimes.
And though I’d never be cruel to my kid as Amy seemed to be, I think her book is a great example that teaching some discipline can do really good for children. I really appreciate she’d shared her experience.
Two hot daughters. Wow, mixed caucasian and asian do have pretty face babies.
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